Dive into the archives.
- Every Time I Fart A Flash Goes Off
I had my first homosexual experience last friday.
I’ve always considered myself quite the deviant, but this time I raised the bar.
1. I had someone enter the back door.
2. I was on so much drugs I don’t even remember the experience.
3. Once they were finished, I paid them.
Top that, sickos.
Dont look at me. I can […]
- Confessions of a gadget addict #392
One reason I absolutely love my Treo:
Always having a blogreader with me means never having to resort to perusing shampoo ingredients when I forget reading material on those long craps.
You know you do it, don’t even look at me that way.
Next time you’re stuck on the crapper finding out how much hydroxypro-pyltrimonium chloride is in […]
- Lap Up All The Luxury
Here’s another little insight into just how twisted my mind is. I had just got back from the conference in phoenix hell, and I was unpacking my crap & Heidi and I were talking…
HEIDI: So that hotel was pretty nice, huh?
ED: Oh yeah- real swanky. Apparently they’re known for their beds. It’s supposed to feel […]
- A Distant Ship’s Smoke on the Horizon
A couple days ago I was driving around somewhere and I had a vision.
It became clear that something was in the air. I rolled down my window to let it out and continued my vision. Perhaps otherworldly beings had given me this insight. Maybe I’m one of those autistic geniuses who can compile huge equations […]
- Meet Ed Adkins, Adult
So I’m at a conference. An accounting conference. In hell. I’m sitting in a presentation on effective proposal programs.
Please allow me to add a touch or foreshadowing. “To know ABOUT the giggle loop is to be PART of the giggle loop.” If you don’t understand, watch more BBC.
If you’re anything close to a regular reader […]
- When People in Hell Die They Go To Phoenix
I stepped off the plane, and into the dumbest nightmare imaginable.
This is Phoenix. It’s going to be somewhere around 732 degrees tomorrow. “oh, but it’s a dry heat.” Uh huh. That makes it better. That’s like saying, “but it’s the good herpes.”
Breezes out here are just depressing. When you grow up somewhere with actual seasons […]
- Find Dave
I sure hope that if I ever go missing that I get this nice of a design for my website.
Find dave.
That sucker is hooked up.
- Humorous Amazon Reviewers Creep Me Out
sarcasomatic: people who write humorous amazon reviews show no originality
jasonadrian: eh?
sarcasomatic: i have no interest in humorous amazon reviews
sarcasomatic: i come accross them occasionally
jasonadrian: i do if theyre good
sarcasomatic: feh
sarcasomatic: pffft meh
sarcasomatic: i dont accept it as an art form
sarcasomatic: perhaps if it was 1998
sarcasomatic: then it would be novel
sarcasomatic: its the modern equivelent of crank calling
sarcasomatic: or its cousin
sarcasomatic: that nobody likes
jasonadrian: keep talknig
sarcasomatic: cause he graduated like […]
