If At All Possible, Avoid Breathing
According to leading authorities, everything is bad for you. Don’t do stuff anymore, cause you really don’t know what will cause migraines, bad breath, anti-nationalism, or randomly exploding tonsils. I’ll see you later- I’ve got to go smoke an asbestos tile while cleaning my assault rifle.
- Starbucks coffee has a lot of caffeine. Oh poo- and all this time I’ve been drinking coffee for it’s homeopathic curing effects.
- Harry Potter Makes People Sick. It’s not just a figure of speech anymore.
- Watching Simpsons is Dangerous… for people who are afraid of satirical animation.
