based on true events
Adkins Central… your place for adkins.
If you want to see what we’re up to just head over to adkinscentral.com and check out what Heidi’s been writing, or just look at pics of paige.
Or you could fly out here to Guam and we’ll have a bar-b-q.
Everything out here is awesome.
For all intents and purposes, though, EADC is shut down for the moment as I switch to wordpress and ready my other projects.
I will be back though- and in 2006.
UPDATE: THE ADKINS ARE BEING OUTSOURCED OVERSEAS
That’s right. In 2.5 weeks we’re packing up the family Mosquito-Coast-style and heading to Guam, where uncle Eddie has a new gig. It’s a great opportunity career-wise and don’t worry Heidi is all “bout it bout it” as the kids say. Of course the fact that it’s a tropical island won’t hurt either. I can’t believe it- I’m finally going to be a real minority. That’s like diplomatic immunity for using slurs in public. I’m going to be the envy of white people all over the country.
I guess this means I have to start blogging again, so keep an eye out for the return of EADC.
Well now, I said I was gonna bring goodies when I came back.
They’re coming. We’re brewing up a collaborative humor blog so you leaches will finally have some good crap to read on the …
The Holidays Are Here (And We’re Still At War) - Brett Dennen
Download this song. Listen to it.
Brett Dennen - The Holidays Are Here (And We’re Still At War) (right click - save as)
Just heard this & had to pass it around. Great acoustic folk/blues song that pretty much sums up the current sentiment.
As you were.
Back Some Time In 2006
Go have fun. See the sights.
I’ll let you know when it’s time to come back.
I’ll bring goodies, too.
Time To Jog
Since getting married and selling out to the man for a desk job, I have- through a strict regiment of beer and hot pockets- dedicated myself to developing the figure of a German grandmother. Today I realized that I do indeed have a problem.
A moment ago, while stretching at my desk, my pants button jettisoned into my coffee. Plunk.
Fair enough, I thought, my belt should keep everything together for the rest of the day.
When to my horror I realized- I forgot my belt. I never forget my belt. I picked today to be the no-belt-guy.
So now 4 staples stand between me and indecent exposure.
Hepticycle
Last night I was confronted by something extremely troubling.
Something that even as I witnessed it my mind tried desperately to dismiss. Like the fannypack, it simply should not exist, yet there it was.
A seven-person bike.
Seven. I had to count them a couple times.
Check it out here. (link)
It’s exactly the same bike. And coincidentally it was helmed by exactly the same pretentiously hip seven people with exactly the same “Wheeeee- follow us to the grocery co-op!” look on their faces.
I got home and what was Heidi’s response?
“You know the only thing better than seeing a seven-person bike? Seeing it hit by a car. That would be hilarious- seven people flying all over the place.”
I am married to the most perfect piece of perfect perfection.
First Call For Contributers
Contributers wanted for new project.
Not willing to give any info at the moment, just use your imagination. You’re reading this blog, you can perhaps guess the tone of said project.
Email me if you’re interested.
Serenity
Holy Ever-Loving Mother Of Crap.
Joss Whedon needs to get a sex change. Then he needs to have a baby with Robert Rodriquez.
The product of this union must then be promised to my daughter in holy matrimony.
I have yet to talk this over with Heidi but I’ve never heard her actually express any problem with arranged marriages. Several of her family members believe she was forced into marrying me, so there shouldn’t be much of a ruckus over it.
I can’t speak for people with, say, friends, or you know, any semblance of social skills- but fans of Whedon are guaranteed multiple orgasms watching this movie. (Think carefully before using this as a first date- it could go either way.)People who didn’t watch Buffy, Angel and Firefly with near-religious fervor- I think you’ll love the …
My Apologies To Austin
Meteorologically, we kept it real, folks
because music festivals with good weather are for pussies.
Once again, Shugs and I brought with us to the festival the worst weather possible.
People were all “OMGWTF the hurricane is coming!” In reality, hurricane Rita would have brought sweet relief, but decided to pass us by. Tease. Instead of her promised thunderstorms, we sat in 106 degree heat and 7 thousand percent humidity.
By day it was way too hot and way too humid. Austin felt like Phoenix and Atlanta’s bastard lovechild. By night it was a scene out of thunderdome. Dust flying everywhere, people had odd bits of clothing tied around them to brave the elements- then there were the dudes in hockey masks, driving around in dune buggies firing shotguns in the air and stealing tankers of gasoline. And um, they sounded Australian.
It felt like …
Ima gonna go see me some muzikal performers
Feeling left out of all the fun of the last hurricane, I’m headed to Texas for 4 days of alt-country PBS goodness at the Austin City Limits festival with my pal Shugs. For 3 days we’ll be in an ocean of beer, birkenstocks and trucker hats.
Your jealousy is ugly. Put it away.
I’m currently waiting out a layover in phoenix. I’m tempted to do another rant about how much I hate this place but i’m afraid i’ll end up with an entire city emailing me- I’ve heard their fans are insane.
Little travel tip. Don’t fly right afer cramming an entire season of Lost into 3 days. It taints the experience.
Even simple pleasures, like reading the skymall, or snorting heroin from a little baggy in the restroom have taken on this really creepy feeling.
Plus that much TV can makes …
